Merci Trey Pennington

treypennington1

E puer schockéierend Neiegkeeten de Moien, héieren vum onerwaarten Doud vum Trey Pennington. Am Mäerz hunn den Trey an den Jay mech gefrot an hirer Radiosendung ze sinn, Op fir Business. Et war e super Gespréich iwwer déi weider Popularitéit vum Bloggen an den Trey huet mir wierklech d'Spotlight an der ganzer Show ginn. Wann Dir seng Facebook Mauer liest, fannt Dir datt Selbstlosegkeet relativ heefeg war an de Messagen déi seng Follower a Frënn hannerlooss hunn.

merci treyEch weess keng Detailer awer et schéngt datt den Trey sech d'Liewe geholl huet. Dat mécht et nawell e Schock. E puer vum Trey Netzwierk fuerderen d'Leit op Hëllef ze sichen wann se Gedanken hunn sech selwer d'Liewen ze huelen. Ech géif dat natierlech och encouragéieren.

Et ass awer eng aner Basisdaten Suerg fir mech. Dem Trey seng Online Persona war erstaunlech. Hie war dacks gereest a war total mat sengem Netzwierk engagéiert. Seng Twitter Säit ass en onendleche Stroum vun Tweets déi anerer encouragéiert, bedankt a gefërdert hunn. D'Suerg fir mech war datt dëst onheemlecht Netzwierk vu Leit war net genuch. Esou transparent wéi mir sinn, entwéckele mir ëmmer nach Personaen online déi net ëmmer mat eisen Offline Erausfuerderunge passen.

D'Wirtschaft saugt grad elo. E puer Leit soen et ze ignoréieren a just weider drécken ... awer ech hunn e puer grave Suergen als Geschäftsbesëtzer. An enger Zäit wou meng Agence weider Erfolleg gesäit, gi mir nach ëmmer erausgefuerdert. Amplaz 100% fir eis Clienten anzesetzen, fanne mir eis 150% fir se anzesetzen ... an heiansdo ass dat net genuch - d'Fuerderunge fléissen ëmmer weider. Iwwerdeems mir méi haart schaffen an eis Clientë wuessen, si se Problemer hunn déi hire Cashflow beaflossen ... an dat ass eppes wat ëmmer déi vun eis upstream beaflosst.

To gewannen in this industry, you have to grow. In order to grow, you have to be engaged and relentlessly promote one another. As your network grows larger, the expectations grow as well. Every speech you provide needs to be better than the last. Every book you write has to be a best-seller. Every blog post has to go viral. Everytime someone contacts you, you have to contact them in return… or else you're either seen as a hypocrite or some kind of elitist. The fact is, the demands put on professionals in this industry are pretty overwhelming.

I'm reading more and more about some of the leaders of the social media industry cutting themselves off, hiring staff to put between them and their network and autoresponding to requests with notices of unavailability. My friends joke with me about not being able to call me or get a hold of me. Some of the less understanding people leave me frustrated messages, then tweet me, then contact me on Facebook… then get downright pissed that I'm not responsive.

Earlier this week, I left my phone on vibrate and it vibrated non-stop with a new call every few minutes. I finally turned it off (as I often do). While I used to work every weekend, now I take time for friends and family – regardless of the workload or the unanswered messages. I simply can't keep up with running a business, executing the work, marketing my business AND responding to every request from my network. When I need time, communication with my network falters.

I'm not complaining. This is the world I've chosen to adopt and work within, and ech hunn dat gär. I'm just asking those of you who benefit from the work online professionals do to take a minute, thank them… and be understanding that we're doing the best we can.

Trey Pennington hat véier Mol déi folgend datt ech hunn. Ech konnt d'Fuerderungen un hien net virstellen. Mir hu gehofft den Trey an eiser Radiosemissioun geschwënn als Merci fir seng Ënnerstëtzung fir mech ze kréien ... Et deet mir leed datt mir dës Geleeënheet net kréien. Awer ech sinn dem Trey dankbar fir d'Geleeënheet déi hie mir ginn huet mat sengem Netzwierk ze kommunizéieren. Dat ass deen Typ vu Guy deen hie war. An ech sinn dankbar fir eis Zäit zesummen online.

16 Comments

  1. 1
  2. 3

    Less than a year ago, our congregation lost a very dear friend to suicide. It was a shock and the same questions as the ones you raised in your post came up and we had to organize a grieving counselling session to address the complex questions of suicide and depression. I learnt a lot in this instance. Hearing of the death of Trey Pennington reenacted some painful feelings and questions, that now I am more at peace with than past fall.

    What you bring up about pressure and demands is certainly a good point. The human soul needs some respite and cannot endure too much pain.

    My thoughts and condolences go to Trey’s family and friends. May his legacy be always for a blessing and may all find soon comfort if possible.

    • 4

      Hi Otir,

      I lost another friend like this a couple years ago and it was a wake-up call. It also made me think to those days and whether it had any impact on my behavior. I’m sure Trey’s legacy will prevail as an incredible source of inspiration. I, too, pray for his family and friends during this terrible time.

      Doug

  3. 5

    I just learned of Trey this morning through tweets from the DC social media community. Very sad. His death so underscores that people in the most pain are often deflecting the focus from themselves, if he was always cheerleading others, as you indicate here (and which I’ve read elsewhere.) I speak as a chronic depression sufferer. It’s so much easier to support other people than to ask for help. It’s a good (and really meaningful!) way to feel or even to appear stronger. And we live in such a fast-moving culture that doesn’t always allow us the time or strength to reach out, as connected as we are.

    I feel for his friends and family, and for him. One must be in unimaginable pain to make the choice to end his life. I hope that others in similar straits will be inspired to reach out.

    • 6

      Depression is such a devious killer, Laurie. You’re so right regarding help. In fact, I’d say that sometimes the joy in helping others often helps to push aside the angst that others suffer from. If anyone is reading these comments and struggling, I surely hope they go for help. Nothing is so hopeless… we can get help and we can find joy again.

  4. 7

    Great post Douglas. There are XNUMX points you make that were a concern for me:

    XNUMX) “As transparent as we are, we still develop personas online that don’t always match our offline challenges.” <= So true and guilty as charged. The irony is that even though I do this, I forget that others probably are too. So when you look on Facebook and you see status updates from friends about all the success they're experiencing, all the 'fun' they're having, it makes me feel even more depressed and boring, lol.

    XNUMX) "My friends joke with me about not being able to call me or get a hold of me." <= I have come to terms with this myself. Even when it comes to responding to inquiries from your network. The truth is that talking to friends during the work day and responding to some queries, is not an income-generating activity. And when it comes down to it, you really have to guard your time and yes, hire gatekeepers to handle and distinguish between the queries that need your attention right away and those that don't. I have been slowly restricting inbound calls lately and it seems harsh but it is something that I have to do, as a solopreneur to maximize my time and bring home the bacon.

    Definitely sorry to hear about Trey Pennington though. Was not familiar with his work. From all the tweets I am reading, he seemed to have been a great guy who made a great contribution to the social media and marketing industry.

    • 8

      Those are such great points, Stephanie. It makes me wonder how valuable these networks are sometimes. 🙂 I’m glad that you are in mine! Don’t hesitate to reach out when you need a pick me up!

  5. 9

    Great post Douglas. There are XNUMX points you make that were a concern for me:

    XNUMX) “As transparent as we are, we still develop personas online that don’t always match our offline challenges.” <= So true and guilty as charged. The irony is that even though I do this, I forget that others probably are too. So when you look on Facebook and you see status updates from friends about all the success they're experiencing, all the 'fun' they're having, it makes me feel even more depressed and boring, lol.

    XNUMX) "My friends joke with me about not being able to call me or get a hold of me." <= I have come to terms with this myself. Even when it comes to responding to inquiries from your network. The truth is that talking to friends during the work day and responding to some queries, is not an income-generating activity. And when it comes down to it, you really have to guard your time and yes, hire gatekeepers to handle and distinguish between the queries that need your attention right away and those that don't. I have been slowly restricting inbound calls lately and it seems harsh but it is something that I have to do, as a solopreneur to maximize my time and bring home the bacon.

    Definitely sorry to hear about Trey Pennington though. Was not familiar with his work. From all the tweets I am reading, he seemed to have been a great guy who made a great contribution to the social media and marketing industry.

  6. 10

    Great post Douglas. There are XNUMX points you make that were a concern for me:

    XNUMX) “As transparent as we are, we still develop personas online that don’t always match our offline challenges.” <= So true and guilty as charged. The irony is that even though I do this, I forget that others probably are too. So when you look on Facebook and you see status updates from friends about all the success they're experiencing, all the 'fun' they're having, it makes me feel even more depressed and boring, lol.

    XNUMX) "My friends joke with me about not being able to call me or get a hold of me." <= I have come to terms with this myself. Even when it comes to responding to inquiries from your network. The truth is that talking to friends during the work day and responding to some queries, is not an income-generating activity. And when it comes down to it, you really have to guard your time and yes, hire gatekeepers to handle and distinguish between the queries that need your attention right away and those that don't. I have been slowly restricting inbound calls lately and it seems harsh but it is something that I have to do, as a solopreneur to maximize my time and bring home the bacon.

    Definitely sorry to hear about Trey Pennington though. Was not familiar with his work. From all the tweets I am reading, he seemed to have been a great guy who made a great contribution to the social media and marketing industry.

  7. 11

    A very heart-felt and passionate post that really speaks to me. As someone who started her own agency following the bankruptcy of my former employer (in homebuilding) and a former agency exec, I know the same pressures.

    I’ve wrestled with myself many times trying to provide myself the justification to take a day off; to work fewer than XNUMX hours every day, to charge for the XNUMXth “free” item that a client has requested and to grow our business. We have grown through the recession and have wonderful clients, but still, the demands are exactly as you’ve outlined them.

  8. 12

    A very heart-felt and passionate post that really speaks to me. As someone who started her own agency following the bankruptcy of my former employer (in homebuilding) and a former agency exec, I know the same pressures.

    Ech hu scho vill mat mir selwer gekämpft a probéiert selwer d'Justifikatioun ze ginn en Dag fräi ze huelen; fir all Dag manner wéi 13 Stonnen ze schaffen, fir de 50. "Gratis" Artikel ze bezuelen deen e Client gefrot huet a fir eist Geschäft ze wuessen. Mir sinn duerch d'Rezessioun gewuess an hu wonnerbar Clienten, awer trotzdem sinn d'Fuerderunge genau wéi Dir se skizzéiert hutt.

  9. 13

    Douglas hie war een en fantastesche Frënd. Zwee e super Gaascht, deen ech hien d'lescht Joer hat, hie war sou léif et war meng éischt Live Fernsehsendung an ech hu mech gefillt wéi ech gejaut hunn just mech selwer ze héieren.

    Ech sinn d'accord datt d'Leit hir Erwaardunge mussen zréckgeruff ginn.

    Souwäit Leit, déi eis Online Personae soen, déi net mat eise Offline Linn passen, sinn ech net averstan. Trey war dat och Persoun perséinlech. Mir als ëffentlech Leit / Persona sinn net bereet eis all perséinlecht Liewen online ze setzen. Firwat solle mir et ass kee Geschäft.

    Also wat géift Dir eis op eiser sozialer Kommunikatioun deelen?

    Wat ech aus dësem wielen ze huelen ass "Wéi wäert ech mat aneren sinn wéinst menger Bezéiung mam Trey?"

    Ech wäert weiderhin e Cheerleader sinn an ech wäert weider vertraut Netzwierk privat vertrauen fir Zäiten déi ech ausluede muss.

    Meng Léift a Gebieder ginn un den Trey seng Kanner wéi ech weess wéi et zerstéierend war wéi meng Elteren sech no 25 Joer Bestietnes gescheed hunn, ech ka mer nëmme virstellen wéi penibel et ass e Suizid ze hunn wéinst enger Scheedung.

    • 14

      Merci fir déi léif Wierder, Michele. Ech sinn averstan datt ech net wëllen datt d'Leit mäi perséinlecht Geschäft kennen. Op der anerer Säit, awer, Follower musse wëssen, wéini datt déi, déi se folgen, vill vun de selwechten Erausfuerderungen hunn (ëffentlech a privat). Et gëtt net sou eppes wéi Superman oder Superfra an ech mengen datt mir dës perfekt Persona mussen zeréckkréien - oder soss léien mir eis einfach all iwwer 'Transparenz', oder net?

      Dem Trey seng Frënn a Famill si a menge Gebieder - wat eng schrecklech, schrecklech Tragödie.

  10. 15

    Douglas hie war een en fantastesche Frënd. Zwee e super Gaascht, deen ech hien d'lescht Joer hat, hie war sou léif et war meng éischt Live Fernsehsendung an ech hu mech gefillt wéi ech gejaut hunn just mech selwer ze héieren.

    Ech sinn d'accord datt d'Leit hir Erwaardunge mussen zréckgeruff ginn.

    Souwäit Leit, déi eis Online Personae soen, déi net mat eise Offline Linn passen, sinn ech net averstan. Trey war dat och Persoun perséinlech. Mir als ëffentlech Leit / Persona sinn net bereet eis all perséinlecht Liewen online ze setzen. Firwat solle mir et ass kee Geschäft.

    Also wat géift Dir eis op eiser sozialer Kommunikatioun deelen?

    Wat ech aus dësem wielen ze huelen ass "Wéi wäert ech mat aneren sinn wéinst menger Bezéiung mam Trey?"

    Ech wäert weiderhin e Cheerleader sinn an ech wäert weider vertraut Netzwierk privat vertrauen fir Zäiten déi ech ausluede muss.

    Meng Léift a Gebieder ginn un den Trey seng Kanner wéi ech weess wéi et zerstéierend war wéi meng Elteren sech no 25 Joer Bestietnes gescheed hunn, ech ka mer nëmme virstellen wéi penibel et ass e Suizid ze hunn wéinst enger Scheedung.

  11. 16

    Super Punkt Doug! Ech hu vill vun de selwechte Kämpf. Ech sinn ëmmer gesot datt ech méi online maache muss, awer ech sinn zimmlech beschäftegt déi meescht Deeg just meng Client Aarbecht gemaach. Probéiert wéi mir kéinten, keen ass perfekt also wou Dir op enger Plaz blénkt, hutt Dir wahrscheinlech Mängel an aneren. Et ass ganz traureg wat mam Trey geschitt ass. Eist perséinlecht Familljeliewen ass vill méi wichteg wéi eist verlängert Netzwierk, a wann d'Fondatioun wackeleg gëtt, kann et einfach fille wéi wann et alles zesummebrach. Segen fir Iech! Meng Sympathien un all Trey senger Famill a Frënn.

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